And now for something a little different...
Thursday last week I went to check my PO box, something I hadn't done for a fortnight or more. In the box was a note to pick up an express package waiting in the main post office building (my "box" is a budget-sized pigeon hole). I collected the package in question, a large tube-shaped carton usually used to ship posters and the like, one which was emblazoned with a large red mouth and a Soothers logo. Soothers, as in the cough lozenge... why the hell would they be sending me something?
Well, to cut to the chase, Soothers has shortlisted Lexicon Devil in a competition to "decide" the "best" music blog in Australia. I'm using inverted commas here, not only because such a competition can only be one which is absurdly subjective, but also because the means in which they intend on judging this result are highly subjective and questionable. But I'm playing along. If only because perhaps I'm an egomaniac, I have fuck-all chance of winning anyway, and because they sent me a free t-shirt (w/ Lexicon Devil printed on it, along w/ my competitors' names). The competitors I speak of? Big-name music web sites such as Mess & Noise, The Vine, Faster Louder and Threethousand - none of which are blogs, mind you, but professional, profit-driven web domains - as well as a few blogs I'm not personally aware of.
So, see those clips below? That's my entry. Click right HERE for the real deal, and if you're not of the opinion that I'm a complete asshole, then you might vote for me on the linked page w/ an "approve" click. I think I can guess who won't be coming to the party. Essentially, the competition entails myself having to curate an imaginary festival (first you have to pick a venue; I chose CBGBs simply because I had little time to fill it out and couldn't be bothered ruminating on trivialities) of five acts put together via Youtube clips, and people vote w/ a yay or nay as to whether it's "the best". How on earth this is actually a deciding factor as to whether your blog is any good or not remains a mystery to me, but I guess overpaid marketing people have to somehow justify their jobs to the bean-counters at Soothers (or whatever megacorp owns them... and I believe I've probably just killed whatever chance I had at winning by that last sentence), and this is the way they've decided to do it.
The winner receives a crappy flying-V guitar-shaped trophy, a pair of $500 studio-worthy headphones which I might be able to get $300 for on ebay, but most importantly of all - and this is where I actually have a sense that someone in marketing does have a clue about the psychology of music blogs - "bragging rights as the SUPREME MUSIC NERD OVERLORD". Now that's more like it.
The idea of attempting to cater this blog to a given audience is beyond me, or perhaps beneath me, so I could only choose five acts whom I know I'd like to see, and frankly, if the idea of seeing Black Flag, the Stooges, Miles Davis, Bad Brains and Black Sabbath on the one bill doesn't thrill you, then the obvious question is, why are you reading this right now?